Bad Pick-up Lines

"Do you want to see something swell?"
"Baby, you're a sex crime waiting to happen."
"You know what would look good on you? Me."
"My name's _____. That's so you know what to scream."
"Gee, I didn't know angels flew so low."
"Are you ok?? 'Cause that fall from heaven looked like it hurt."
"Are you tired? 'Cause you've been running through my head all day."
"Do you fuck on a first date? No? Well, see you tomorrow then."
"Say, didn't we go to different schools together?"
"Why don't you come over here, sit on my lap and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up?"
"Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?"
"My face is leaving in 10 minutes. Be on it."
"You dont sweat much for a fat chick."
"Do you know the difference between having a beer and having sex? No? Well, let's go back to my place for a beer."
"Can I borrow a quarter? I want to call your mother and thank her."
"Would be my love buffet? So I could lay you out on the table and take what I want?"
"Let's go back to my place and do all the things I will tell everyone we did anyway."
"Someone call heaven and tell them one of their angels is loose."
"Would you like to dance or should I go fuck myself again?"
"I'm not trying to pressure you, I don't want to have sex without mutual consent; and by the way, you have my consent."
"Hey babe, how about a pizza and a fuck? Hey! What's wrong, don't you like pizza?
"Here, let me clean you off a place to sit." Make a big display of wiping off your mouth with your hands.
"Is it hot in here or is it just you?" Grab her butt and say, "Pardon me, is this seat taken?"
"I like every muscle in your body, especially mine."
"When she asks for a match: "How about the hair on my head and the hair between your legs?"
"How about you and I go back to my place and get out of these wet clothes?"
"Call and whistle "Lucky, here boy." When she asks what you are doing: "I'm trying to get Lucky. Want to help?"
"Hey baby, what's your sign? Mine's 'Slippery When Wet."
"I'm new in town. Could you give me the directions to your apartment?"
"You look like the type of girl that has heard every line in the book. So what's one more?"
"Excuse me. Do you want to fuck or should I apologize?"
"Do you wash your clothes with Windex? Cause I can see myself in your pants."
"When she asks, "Excuse me, do you have the time?" You: "Do you have the energy?"
"You've got the nicest set of teeth that I've ever come across."
"I think I'm falling in love with you. Now do you want to fuck?"
"The word of the day is legs, so let's go back to my place and spread the word."
"Excuse me, have I fucked you yet?"
"Sex is a killer...want to die happy?"
"If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together."
"Should I call you in the morning, or nudge you?"
"Do you have any Italian in you? No? Would you like some?"
"Was your father a thief? 'Cause someone stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes."
"Look at the tag in her shirt and say: "I want to see if you were really made in heaven."
"How do you like your eggs in the morning? Fried, scrambled, or fertilized?"
"If I told you that you had a great body, would you hold it against me?"
"I forgot your name, can I just call you mine?"
"Do you believe in love at first sight, or do I have to walk by you again?"
"Fuck me if I'm wrong, but isn't your name Gretchen?"
"Nice shoes... wanna fuck?"
"I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Walmart, so I could ride you all day long for a quarter."
"Just call me milk, I'll do your body good."
"Your body's name must be visa, because it's everywhere I want to be."
"If your left leg was Thanksgiving and your right leg Christmas, can I visit you between the Holidays?"
"I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your Bed Rock."
"I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you!"
"My love for you is like the energizer bunny, it keeps going and going..."
"Yo Baby, you be my Dairy Queen, I'll be your Burger King, you treat me right, and I'll do it your way right away."
"I'd like to screw your brains out, but it appears that someone beat me to it."
"If you were a new hamburger at McDonald's, you would be McGorgeous."
"Is that Windex? Because I can see myself in your pants."
"Wanna Play House? You be the screen door and I'll slam you all night long."
"Guy: "Would you like to dance?" Girl: "I don't care for this song and surely wouldn't dance with you" Guy: "I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me, I said you look fat in those pants"
"Excuse me, can I have your phone number, I seem to have lost mine."
"I love every bone in your body - especially mine."
"You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away."
"Hi, I'm a necrophiliac, how good are you at playing dead?"
"I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room."
"The fact that I'm missing my teeth just means that there's more room for your tongue."
"Guy: "haven't I seen you someplace before?" Girl:"Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore."

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